ZMoe.com

The interest I thought was there wasn’t, from her side. Just friends. Boy do I have a lot of friends. lol

Went to the bank tonight and deposited a check, got the receipt and noticed the balance was a very large amount LESS than what it should have been. Raced home on the verge of freaking out, logged onto online banking and was partially relieved when the amount was actually from my savings account. The ATM didn’t let me deposit into my checking…. because there was suspicious behavior with it. I noticed said behavior because my checking account balance was about $7,000 short. Called the bank and they’re investigating and will be reimbursing my money, but only as the charges post to the account and I sign the affidavits associated with the charges (they’ll be mailing them to me). It looks like someone got all of my account information, including address/name/social security number, and ordered a new card (with a different number) and had it sent to an address in Reseda. Then the person used it for a shopping spree from Reseda to Vegas in the last 24 hours, including a $3,800 stop at the Apple store in LA. With that kind of activity, one would think my bank would have called me to make sure I was the one actually spending all that money. Nope. Not a peep. The only thing done was blocking me from depositing into my checking. They didn’t even notify me of it. Needless to say, once I get all my money back, I’ll be saying goodbye to Bank of America.

I feel a mood coming on. The combination of my bike crapping on me and embarrassment I felt Friday night has me thinking in a downward direction. The interest I hold is making me impatient, which is weird for me since if you know me, you know how patient I can be.

I need to get my bike into a shop so I can fix it and ride it. Riding takes my mind off of everything else.

The question I asked went without the kind of response I was hoping for. Interest is there, just not that particular interest yet. Oh well, she’s still really cool and I plan on seeing her again.

So the path ahead is that of interest, not relationship nor friendship just yet. Still making our way to the fork.

Met a girl that has a lot of the same interests as me. She doesn’t ride, but competes in paintball tournaments, so we both have that one major interest that makes us different. Our “own thing” so to speak. Going on our 3rd date tonight. So far things have been going pretty well, we get along great so I think she’s interested at least on some level. I plan on finding out for sure tonight. Tomorrow I’ll either have a definite potential relationship path, or a cool new female friend.

With everything else that’s going not well, there’s one thing that could be promising. It’s too early to tell really since we’ve only gone on one lunch date. We’re going again (lunch date) this coming Wednesday, so hopefully it’ll go even better than the first one. I enjoyed meeting and talking to her, and look forward to getting to know her more.

In an odd turn of events… my usual not busy-ness has taken a 180 this week. Monday is I think the final round of bowling with work. Tuesday I’m having lunch with Angela then dinner with Shelly (yes my ex gf). Wednesday is the second lunch date with the aforementioned girl, Thursday is dinner with my friends Aki & Jane. Friday seems to be my only free weeknight, and even then I may be heading out to pick up a loaner bike for my ride on Saturday. And Sunday I’m going hiking. I almost wish every week were this busy… but then I’d probably get burned out from it. lol

Here’s to hoping Wednesday leads to a 3rd and beyond.

So as if I wasn’t feeling down enough already about work and home life… the one thing that was keeping me happy, my 900RR, crapped on me tonight. I stopped for gas with HurricaneGirl on our way to a bike night… I get gas, the bike starts fine. HG needed air in her tires so we ride/park near the air pump. When it’s determined the pump doesn’t work, we figure we’ll get air out by the bike night. …but my bike won’t start. No lights even come on. I don’t have tools with the bike to get to the fuses to check those, so I had to ride her bike back to my place to get my van to go back and pick up her and my bike. We missed the bike night, and even after unloading my bike, it still won’t start. Still no lights. On top of that, after unloading, I went to move the van and it wouldn’t crank. At least it had lights. I had to fiddle with the kill switch to get it to start. Seems that’s starting to take a crap on me too.

Home life is eating me alive.
I’m not motivated at work, because of work.
The 7 still has the hesitation problem.
The 900 has starting problems.
And now the van seems to be on its last leg.

And here I thought with the 7 things would only get better. Fuck.

The sister wouldn’t be able to afford my house. Plus my mom wouldn’t have anyone reliable (time wise) to take her to her doctor’s appointments. So I’m trapped at least until like July ‘09, I figure it’ll take my sister that long (Feb-July) to find a place.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m thankfull for what I have, but I hate the situation I’m in.

Those who are aware of what’s going on in my home life have told me they don’t know how I’m staying sane and hanging on. To be honest, I don’t know how I’m doing it either. I hope for my sake, and the sake of those around me, I never break. …who am I kidding, I never will, I’m too thoughtful of other people.

So quite a bit has gone on since my last update…
I’m back on my old project but was told I have to perform “Above Target” and be an attention whore in order to just KEEP my job. As if I had low motivation before, now it’s totally gone.

I got another bike, but not a new one. When I was originally looking for my 900RR I was looking for the red/white/blue ‘93 but couldn’t find one in good condition. After crashing my near mint ‘94, a buddy sold me his red/white/blue ‘93. I love the 900RR, so I’m happy to have it. I mean… it IS my dream bike after all. How many people ever actually own their dream bike?

Having my sister and her kids living with me is taking a serious toll on me. A friend told me they could see it in my face. I’m seriously entertaining the idea of letting them rent my house so I can move out. It can’t happen until ‘09, but still… the thought alone is appealing.

My dog is sick. She’s not sleeping where she normally sleeps, and she seems to not have the same level of energy as normal. She’s nearly 13 years old, I hope she isn’t dieing. That would suck big time.

My mom is depressed because the dog is sick, and one of her cats ran away.

Various friends have issues in their lives that they bring upon themselves even though the easy and stress free solution to certain problems is right in front of them (me). Being that I’m too nice, maybe they’re just trying not to take advantage of me. The way I see it, if I offer something, they aren’t taking advantage. It’s if they expect something, that’s when they’re taking advantage.

Dating… is all but non existant right now. I’m in a serious funk. It could be due to all of the above (minus the bike). I’m so not motivated in life right now it sucks, and I’m sure not dating is contributing to it like a vicious circle. At some point I’ll need to force myself to stop being depressed. Or stay depressed and just pretend I’m not, I’ve done that many times.

So the ball has been left in their court for the last 2 days. I even tried calling on my way home from work but got voicemail, then got cut off so I couldn’t even leave a message. Yay me. lol

Probably just busy, I’m not getting weird about it, I just haven’t posted anything here much lately and this was what I was thinking about.

“Hey guys I’m looking for Amanda Hugginkiss. Come on… I need Amanda Hugginkiss” - Moe